I have a good deal of respect for your comments and can identify with much of your personal journey. Most of my family was and is liberal, though my maternal grandparents were as conservative and bigoted as the day is long. Their very narrow opinions made for a lot of friction in my youth including me letting them know how objectionable they were socially and morally. I'm afraid I lacked tact and grace more than I do now and by the time I was 20 had damaged my relationship with them beyond repair. When my grandfather died in 1974 we were on very bitter terms. My relationship with my grandmother improved a great deal but still, by the time she died in the early aughts, there were huge gaps in our relationship because of our personal beliefs. Now, I am constantly at loggerheads with my in-laws. They are wealthy, well educated and viciously Republican. If there has been a silver lining in Covid it's been our inability, (and unwillingness), to travel freely thus reducing my face to face exposure to their ever growing hate. They are in their 80s and 90s and will never change their points of view. All this despite the fact they have a Black granddaughter. They are unwilling to acknowledge how potentially damaging their beliefs are to her future as an American. She is eight. There will come a time, though, if they live long enough, where their bigotry and racism will become more apparent and impactful to her personally. I hope it never goes that far.
“Why do I surprise you?” Thank you for your transparency about yourself. That honesty answers the question. I didn’t have really good words for how to describe your post: sharp, biting, incisive. You just have a wickedly good insight into the whole Republican-Party-Kissing- Trump’s-Ass thing that just happened. Super nice insight.
Your tale about your in-laws: my dad is Republican conservative wealthy and downright stupid. I’m trying to decide what is harder, well-educated bigoted conservative in-laws or Dummkopf conservative bigoted father. The one constant is that they all seem to be rockheads. A jackhammer wouldn’t even do the trick of cracking them.
Ah, well, thanks. I appreciate that. I honestly believe wealthy, well educated bigots inflict a lot more harm in both the short and long run. They have the money to influence and frequently the ability to craft appealing rhetoric that sounds both logical and socially appropriate. They can justify murder if they have a mind to.
A lot of factors have brought me to where I am today. A lot about my childhood and teenage years did not strike me as unusual at the time. The realization that most people didn't have a 5 day a week maid or places to spend the summer just didn't hit home while I was "living in it". I look back on what was normal for my family at and am stunned by how fortunate we were, how much we took for granted. How many assumptions I made. The first huge eye opener was in the summer between my Junior and Senior years. I participated in a summer theater program at Montgomery Blair High School in Silver Spring, MD. I became friends with a Black girl from DC during that summer. One day, she didn't come back to the theater from the restroom. I went to find her because we were reading scenes and we're up next. I found her in the bathroom beaten up, with a wet head, full of bubble gum. Her head had been dunked in the toilet. Several of Montgomery County's finest white girls were responsible. As horrified and angry as I was I cannot begin to understand the pain that young woman felt. I cannot imagine living with that experience embedded in my brain for the rest of my life. Of course, she never came back. And, of course, it didn't make the Post or the Star, because events like that were kept quiet and brushed under the rug. I'd love to tell you that that story is a figment of my imagination, but it's not. I will tell you that it was a huge epiphany for me. Had I seen racism before that day? Yes. Had I ever encountered that level of violence on a personal level before that incident? No. That one day forced me to understand racism viscerally, not just intellectually. It forced me to reevaluate everyone and everything around me. And speak up.
Daria, I had a little time to read comments this evening. Your story, stopped me from going on. Seeing the attack on your friend appears to be embedded in you. I wasn't a witness as you were, but the ugliness, disrespect and condescension that I saw as a child impressed me to know more. My antipathy to racism seems to be brain wired. Thank you, Daria, for sharing your experience.
Daria this is just brilliant. I have to include lynching and vicious violence in my screeds about the Republican Party being the bastion of the old Confederacy. I have to mention summary killings of Native Americans, by U.S. Cavalry, by settlers, by Spaniards and Texans and Californians and . . . . . . . Whites-first, racism, is not just genteel policy arguments on HCR and in the halls of Congress and state legislatures. Racism is DANGEROUS. Racism is GENOCIDAL. Racism, sexism, gay-ism, kills people. These are not polite conversation. When TC talks about “they pull out a knife, you pull out a gun,” these are not empty metaphors.
TC, easily the best post of the day and possibly your best work here on HCR. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆
The last time I saw my grandmother in 1987 she was in her 80s and in a nursing home in Mississippi. I didn’t tell her that I had married a “nigra” woman & don’t know if anyone else in the family let her in on this ‘secret.’ I was her first grandson and sort of favorite. What would be the point? She and her generation were leaving.
Daria, you surprise me.
And delight me.
Ha! Thanks, Roland!. Why do I surprise you?
I have a good deal of respect for your comments and can identify with much of your personal journey. Most of my family was and is liberal, though my maternal grandparents were as conservative and bigoted as the day is long. Their very narrow opinions made for a lot of friction in my youth including me letting them know how objectionable they were socially and morally. I'm afraid I lacked tact and grace more than I do now and by the time I was 20 had damaged my relationship with them beyond repair. When my grandfather died in 1974 we were on very bitter terms. My relationship with my grandmother improved a great deal but still, by the time she died in the early aughts, there were huge gaps in our relationship because of our personal beliefs. Now, I am constantly at loggerheads with my in-laws. They are wealthy, well educated and viciously Republican. If there has been a silver lining in Covid it's been our inability, (and unwillingness), to travel freely thus reducing my face to face exposure to their ever growing hate. They are in their 80s and 90s and will never change their points of view. All this despite the fact they have a Black granddaughter. They are unwilling to acknowledge how potentially damaging their beliefs are to her future as an American. She is eight. There will come a time, though, if they live long enough, where their bigotry and racism will become more apparent and impactful to her personally. I hope it never goes that far.
“Why do I surprise you?” Thank you for your transparency about yourself. That honesty answers the question. I didn’t have really good words for how to describe your post: sharp, biting, incisive. You just have a wickedly good insight into the whole Republican-Party-Kissing- Trump’s-Ass thing that just happened. Super nice insight.
Your tale about your in-laws: my dad is Republican conservative wealthy and downright stupid. I’m trying to decide what is harder, well-educated bigoted conservative in-laws or Dummkopf conservative bigoted father. The one constant is that they all seem to be rockheads. A jackhammer wouldn’t even do the trick of cracking them.
Ah, well, thanks. I appreciate that. I honestly believe wealthy, well educated bigots inflict a lot more harm in both the short and long run. They have the money to influence and frequently the ability to craft appealing rhetoric that sounds both logical and socially appropriate. They can justify murder if they have a mind to.
A lot of factors have brought me to where I am today. A lot about my childhood and teenage years did not strike me as unusual at the time. The realization that most people didn't have a 5 day a week maid or places to spend the summer just didn't hit home while I was "living in it". I look back on what was normal for my family at and am stunned by how fortunate we were, how much we took for granted. How many assumptions I made. The first huge eye opener was in the summer between my Junior and Senior years. I participated in a summer theater program at Montgomery Blair High School in Silver Spring, MD. I became friends with a Black girl from DC during that summer. One day, she didn't come back to the theater from the restroom. I went to find her because we were reading scenes and we're up next. I found her in the bathroom beaten up, with a wet head, full of bubble gum. Her head had been dunked in the toilet. Several of Montgomery County's finest white girls were responsible. As horrified and angry as I was I cannot begin to understand the pain that young woman felt. I cannot imagine living with that experience embedded in my brain for the rest of my life. Of course, she never came back. And, of course, it didn't make the Post or the Star, because events like that were kept quiet and brushed under the rug. I'd love to tell you that that story is a figment of my imagination, but it's not. I will tell you that it was a huge epiphany for me. Had I seen racism before that day? Yes. Had I ever encountered that level of violence on a personal level before that incident? No. That one day forced me to understand racism viscerally, not just intellectually. It forced me to reevaluate everyone and everything around me. And speak up.
It's good to share this harrowing story, Daria. Hopefully she went past the trauma to become a fierce activist for civil rights.
Daria, I had a little time to read comments this evening. Your story, stopped me from going on. Seeing the attack on your friend appears to be embedded in you. I wasn't a witness as you were, but the ugliness, disrespect and condescension that I saw as a child impressed me to know more. My antipathy to racism seems to be brain wired. Thank you, Daria, for sharing your experience.
Daria this is just brilliant. I have to include lynching and vicious violence in my screeds about the Republican Party being the bastion of the old Confederacy. I have to mention summary killings of Native Americans, by U.S. Cavalry, by settlers, by Spaniards and Texans and Californians and . . . . . . . Whites-first, racism, is not just genteel policy arguments on HCR and in the halls of Congress and state legislatures. Racism is DANGEROUS. Racism is GENOCIDAL. Racism, sexism, gay-ism, kills people. These are not polite conversation. When TC talks about “they pull out a knife, you pull out a gun,” these are not empty metaphors.
TC, easily the best post of the day and possibly your best work here on HCR. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆
The last time I saw my grandmother in 1987 she was in her 80s and in a nursing home in Mississippi. I didn’t tell her that I had married a “nigra” woman & don’t know if anyone else in the family let her in on this ‘secret.’ I was her first grandson and sort of favorite. What would be the point? She and her generation were leaving.
I get that.