313 Comments

I love you all...I have opted out this week from reading anything...and pray the world stays on its axis. My mom died on Tuesday. It was March 13, 2020 that I last kissed her goodbye as her assisted living went in to lockdown. On March 16,2021 she succumbed to the Covid Confinement. 1 year of lying in bed, looking out a window or sitting in a chair...all day...took its grim toll. I was scheduled for my second shot and an arrival visit Mom date of April 8. My heart hurts. She counts as a casualty of this virus, please don’t forget our elders.

Expand full comment

Betty, when my brother passed, alone in a hospital bed I cried because I was not with him when he left. When the tears began to dry, I found him again, and see him every day, in clearing skies, streams and leaves dancing, river water ripples and the cadence of a passing stranger’s voice. I hope you find your mother, a communion with her in some shared love. First, and always, love. Heartfelt condolences, Betty.

Expand full comment

I’m fairly certain this is one of the most beautiful pieces of writing I’ve had the privilege to read, Mr. Dooley.

Expand full comment

Tears for the losses. Tears for the beauty. Tears for their names forever being a blessings. Wrapping all in an everlasting hug of love.

Expand full comment

R Dooley, that is beautiful. Twice in the past week, I've been shown the poem, "When I Die, Give Me Away", by Merrit Malloy. One of those times may have been on these pages; I don't recall where I first saw it. But your sentiments brought it to mind again. Thank you.

Expand full comment

A beautiful poem that I hadn't read - thank you for sharing it.

Expand full comment

Condolences for the loss of your brother I agree with Shannon, very moving and beautiful sentiment.

Expand full comment

Betty, so sorry for your loss. Loss is so much harder with not having had the opportunity to be there in person to lend comfort. The fact that you are here in this group means that your mother clearly raised a wonderful person. May your fond memories help ease your pain.

Expand full comment

Dear girl, I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. I can't imagine how much you hurt right now. I lost my own mother some years ago, under better circumstances, and the grief was terrible. Yet, as R Dooley says so beautifully below, I saw and heard her everywhere, and I still do. Love is everything. You are in a loving community here. I reach out to you with comfort and love.

Expand full comment

I am so sorry for your loss and the extra layer of “what if’s” that came with it so near to your second dose of the vaccination and planned visitation date. I’m on your schedule to see my 96 year old dad who lives across the country from me and I haven’t been with for 16 months. I will think of you and hold you and your mother in my heart, Betty.

Expand full comment

This morning I awoke to a new day and my inbox was flooded with HCR Community Love. Thank you dear friends for the hug. Your words of strength, kindness and love give me hope for this world and peace in my heart.

Expand full comment

Betty, I could not be with my husband last fall when he died of ALS just a week before the election. I truly understand the pain you feel of not being to visit frequently and wrap loving arms around your mom. But she knew. She knew and felt your love every day. Hat she made it a whole year is testement to the strength of your love and caring for her.

As my wonderful Jewish friends would say, may her name forever be a blessing.

Expand full comment

A Woman of Valor. My deepest condolences.

Expand full comment

Ih Betty, what a sad loss, the most painful loss, your Mom.... and in such a cruel way to have to let her go. I ache for you, and will pray that she is close enough that you will feel her with you forever...she will be there. Just close your eyes and let her hold you, as we all will, with our hearts....

Expand full comment

March 13th, my Daddy's death too. Now that I am old too, thank you. Love and embrace.

Expand full comment

Betty 🥺 — sending extra hugs for you tonight on the vernal equinox and hoping you will regain equilibrium before too long. May your mother’s memory always be called for blessings.

Expand full comment

Oh God, I am so very sorry. Yes, a casualty. And I will not forget, ever.

Expand full comment

Condolences to you and your family. I left my home when Covid shutdowns began, and stayed with my dear mother for 8 months in her home as she slowly slipped away. It is never easy, and I am sure your mother had many wonderful memories to review in her last days. 💖

Expand full comment

Oh honey. I’m so saddened by your mom’s story. Thanks for sharing it Betty. She is eternally blessed by you.

Expand full comment

Crushing. I am so sorry.

Expand full comment

Allow me to add my wishes and condolences to this loving chorus of sympathy. Not much to add to the beautiful sentiments expressed here. The tragedy of this virus has touched us all in varying degrees. Your experience, and others like it, is the cruelest of them all. My heartfelt prayer for you and your family is one the Dutch always wish in such moments: "sterkte", "strength". May it help ground you through these coming days and weeks. And may the warm, loving memory of your mom enfold you and keep you and yours strong. God be with you.

Expand full comment

Oh precious being. My heart lurched and sank reading this. There are never words available to express. Huge, huge hugs. If you ever need someone to just listen I am on WhatsApp so calls are free.

Expand full comment

I am so sorry for your heartbreaking loss Betty. May your mom's memory be a blessing to you and all who loved her.

Expand full comment

Spring time! It has been a beautiful day here in Texas. The Monarch butterflies have been back for over a week now. I've even seen a June bug. The wildflowers haven't blossomed yet but it shouldn't be too long. Then it will look like lakes of Bluebonnets. One of the best things Lady Bird Johnson did for Texas and the country was the Highway Beautification Act sowing wild flowers in the medians and sides of the Interstates and removing the clutter of billboards. See the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center website for a peak at Texas spring time: https://www.wildflower.org/magazine Enjoy!

Expand full comment

"Keep America Beautiful"

-- Lady Bird Johnson

Expand full comment

Cathy, Lady Bird Johnson's Wildflower Center is beautiful and informative. I will return to it. Thank you HAPPY SPRING!

Expand full comment

I read today about a new book that might be of interest:

LADY BIRD JOHNSON

Hiding in Plain Sight

By Julia Sweig

Expand full comment

Beautiful CBS Sunday Morning story about her with her dsughter and granddaughter last week:

https://www.cbsnews.com/video/lady-bird-johnson-first-lady-and-diarist/

Expand full comment

Watching it now. Thank you.

Expand full comment

I'm so glad you have Monarchs, I worry about them.

Expand full comment

Lived in Ft. Worth for 15yrs, and as a Virginian could never have imagined how beautiful bluebonnets are. Good work by the Texas DOT in planting them all along the highways and interstates - truly a blessing!

Expand full comment

Thank you for the valuable, interesting link!

Expand full comment

I've begun to look forward to your Saturday night photos and good-nights as much as to the Letter from an American that will be my first read the next, and every, morning.

Expand full comment

Nothing beats getting outside and working, even if the soil is still soggy, and starting to tackle all the projects one envisions in winter. Today, I dug up two daylilies, a euphorbia, and a daphne. I'm making room for rose bushes that I bought as a birthday gift for my mother-in-law. As I worked, a woman I've seen in the neighborhood but never met called out from across the street. She was walking a tiny dog, and her cat followed closed by. "What are you going to do with the plants?" Give then away, I said. Long story short, I took the daphne to her house and planted it. She was thrilled, then explained what a rough year it had been, learning she had cancer and ungergoing treatment. "I'm going to be OK," she said, smiling down at the daphne.

Expand full comment

Well done, Michael; turning a pandemic into lemonade!

Expand full comment

Yesterday, in Norway, I sat down on a bench out of doors for the first time this year. Not because I had to rest during a hike, but because the sun was finally warm enough. The first shot of the vaccine in my arm.

Expand full comment

Thank you Heather for a glimpse into your world and your diligent and superlative commentaries. They are always intrinsically both intellectually and emotionally digestible. They nourish, calm, inspire — everything good writing can be and can do for the soul. I am grateful for them. I woke at 6am to a spring chorus of seagulls, crows, robins, blackbirds and surf floating through my window. Fleecy mares tail clouds fly above the sea and a hawk has found a thermal over the town and is rising upwards looking for some perfect view, or perhaps just breakfast. Today the sand trucks are on the move. It’s cleanup time. All winter the sand blows wild and accumulates on the prom and carpark, big drifts that get higher with every storm. It is no fun at all trying to bicycle over them. Now they are all being scooped up and transported back to the surf line. Mini grey pyramids will dot the water line all day. Then the tide will come in and melt them. Wash everything clean and flat again. A clean slate. A new fresh beginning. The spring season can now commence.

Expand full comment

Lovely writing. You know the power of active verbs.

Expand full comment

What a lovely descriptive comment! I long for beach walks, and time with my family.

Expand full comment

Robin, reading your letter is like Listening to a Symphony!!! Omgosh, Thank YOU!!!😊💕

Expand full comment

"Happy spring, everyone."

Indeed! Spring, the rebirth, when the world awakens and becomes new again, seems to mean so much more this year. We emrge from a winter of more than our discontent.

My left arm is sore from my second Pfizer shot, but I'll work that out with the rake today, with the sun warm on my shoulder, and the ice receding on the lake.

Happy spring, everyone!

Expand full comment

I had fun raking today too Ralph.

Expand full comment

Happy Mud Season Heather! As a former rural New Englander I say: may your boots be leak proof and your kettle always on the simmer. xxoo

Expand full comment

Where in New England, Daria?

Expand full comment

Here in TX, bluebonnets now dot my front yard. If only I could attach a picture ....

Expand full comment

Morning Cig! They're so dazzling, we can see them here in eastern Massachusetts.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rq4TvMACL5g

http://www.jasonrweingart.com/blog/2019-texas-bluebonnet-forecast-and-best-locations

Expand full comment

Oh, what beautiful imagery! Bluebonnets are lupine. They remind me a one of my favorite children’s books by Barbara Cooney, Miss Rumphius. She, too wanted to make the world a more beautiful place by spreading lupine seeds all over the coast of Maine. The book was inspired by the real life "Lupine Lady," Hilda Hamlin.

https://www.newenglandhistoricalsociety.com/how-real-miss-rumphius-decorated-maine-lupines/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miss_Rumphius

Expand full comment

I love that book and read it to my granddaughters. I learned to love lupine in the Sierra, especially hiking and camping in the John Muir Wilderness and around Huntington Lake. A friend’s cabin, where I stayed each summer for years, is, alas, gone after last fall’s wildfires. No place and no no person is ever fully lost if they remain in your memory. And you will find them, as R Dooley, so beautifully writes, in your heart, mind, and senses.

Expand full comment

I turned around to look for Miss Rumphius on my bookshelf to look at the wonderful, gentle illustrations, and she isn't there! I must have given her to a friend in a rare moment of book generosity. It's hard for me to give away books I love, but sometimes it's the right thing to do.

Expand full comment

02238! I lived in Cambridge for grad school in the early 1990s. Loved it!

Expand full comment

My first husband's great aunt was on the committee to determine the state flower. She wanted the bluebell. I'm so glad the bluebonnet became the state flower. I miss Bluebell Ice Cream.

Expand full comment

It was a gorgeous spring day here in the SF Bay Area. Took the dogs on a long hike through the Berkeley hills. I love your photos from Maine.

Expand full comment

My husband and I spent the day hiking on winter-soft legs, with ski poles and metal cleats, an icy wilderness trail to Chickering Bog. I know exactly what you mean about this breathless time between seasons. The sun on our faces, the breath of the cold woods, old stone walls furred with the bright and busy mosses. Woodpeckers. The wide bog of stunted cedars, and there a young family sprawled on the catwalk, eating a picnic lunch. A child with bare arms smiled at us as she tossed bits of popcorn onto the ice. Life is full of miracles.

Expand full comment

Anyone else hungry for lobster after seeing the photo?

Broiled lobster, boiled lobster, lobster roll, lobster salad, lobster skewers, lobster mac & cheese, lobster bisque, lobster chowder, lobster pizza.

Lobster pizza???

Expand full comment

Morning, TPJ!! I'll have one of each, please and thank you.

Expand full comment

I had lobster-stuffed ravioli the other night! Delicious.

Expand full comment

I knew something was missing from the list.

Expand full comment

Lobster tacos

Expand full comment

And lobster enchiladas (this and tacos common in Calfornia, Baja and Nord)

Expand full comment

Lobster tails. Plural.

Expand full comment

Lobster soufflé, baby spinach salad, cheese scones and a bottle of dry french white please.

Expand full comment

Now you're talking!!!!!😊💕

Expand full comment

Oh man! I just read that the Hungry I closed in 2018. It is one of our favorite restaurants in Boston. We were there in about 2002 and 2003 and fell in love with Peter, his food, martinis, and stories. He was building a home somewhere in South America.

Expand full comment

Any way, any time.

Expand full comment

Hear, hear! Couldn't agree more. I spent the day at a mass vaccination clinic with the blustery weather, rain, sun, blowing, freezing, repeat and it was a joy to be part of moving the pandemic off center stage.

Expand full comment

Thank you for your service, Vickie!

Expand full comment

Ah, thanks. It is a wonderful feeling to be moving the needle (bad pun)on this dread disease.

Expand full comment

We're a little ahead of you down here on the Ma coast. There are buds showing on the trees, and the true harbinger of spring is what I call the colorcast of a large willow tree next door beside the pond. It gives off a yellowish glow well before anything else wakes up. In December, in a fit of pandemic fatigue, my wife enlisted a gardener to plant 1000 daffodil and hyacinth bulbs. She said she needed something bursting with pride come spring, pandemic still around or not. This frugal New England curmudgeon was appalled at the extravagance (that's a lotta bulbs!), since our yard has previously been stripped of every bulb I ever planted...skunks, woodchucks, who ever knows? have feasted at my expense for years......She was sure they'd come up,though, because the gardener promised her that "nothing eats daffodils." Well.....something is eating something out there, because there are 4" holes and the remains of munched-on plant material in a few places. Whatever it is, I don't suppose he or she can ruin all 1000 bulbs; some will make it, as I see them peeking their heads up in bunches here and there.

Happy spring indeed.

Expand full comment

We have the same critter problem. Every few years, I have to replenish the gardens. I planted about 150 bulbs last fall (not nearly enough). I’m hoping my efforts were not just to feed the squirrels!

Expand full comment

After planting the bulbs, lay a piece of chicken wire or hardware cloth down, about 1" or so below the soil. They can't dig through that!! You may have to anchor it, of course, but it works.

Expand full comment

Our digging dog has forced us to find a solution. We lay down chicken wire, pin it down and cover with a thin layer of soil or mulch. Plants come through, but, paws can’t dig them up.

Expand full comment

For some reason the rodents have never bothered my daffodils or jonquils but they loved tulip bulbs! Learned my lesson & I really love the others - tulips not so much. Have about 2-3" of green showing which has been hanging in there with the 20 degree nights! At least the sun is shining & it gets up to 50 in the daytime. Still much snow up back by the woods and piles where it was pushed off the driveway. Will take a while to melt.

Expand full comment

I have had the same experience here in Le Marche. Nothing seems to eat the daffodils, but tulips are a real treat for our local porcupines. I gave up trying to grow them several years ago. Oh well, the fruit trees are blooming....

Expand full comment

Well, answered this & got "something went wrong" in red!

Expand full comment

That's happened several times in the last few minutes.

Expand full comment

Now it seems not to be happening.

Expand full comment

Glad it isnt just ME!

Expand full comment

Well, I received "Well, answered this & got "something went wrong" in red!"

So, I guess it worked. Is that your message? Same thing happened to me. Happy spring in any case!

Expand full comment

Nope wasnt original message, but at this point dont remember exactly what I had typed, so couldnt have been all that important, right?

Expand full comment

Oh well, alla prossima!

Expand full comment

Yep, the squirrels seem to have adapted to eating daffodil bulbs. Mine get chomped on too when they never did before.

Expand full comment

Can't keep myself inside! Spring here in Boise, Idaho, and I am already in my garden most of the day, clearing dead stuff from around my perennials. watching things bud out and pop up from the ground, and planting lettuce and broccoli in my raised beds. Happy time!

Expand full comment

Morning Phyllis! I've been to Idaho twice. Once for a wonderful cousin's wedding, and also when I hiked to the top of Jackson Mt and stuck my toe over the state line.

Expand full comment

Yup, we all need some brain drain rest! I sat by a fire pit with some friends today and tomorrow (Sunday) we’ll play our first round of golf for the season. Still a little snow on the fairways, but we can work around that! Most of us are getting our 2nd shot this week and while we won’t throw all caution to the wind, there will be a spring (literally) in our steps. Relief too that in 2 more weeks, our chances of dying from Covid, drop to zero (at least for awhile!) Another bright spot - not hearing trump or any of the looney tunes in his cabinet and family. We can now redirect our rants and raves to our golf game :)

Expand full comment

Not to rain on your parade, but to encourage you to maintain appropriate layers of protection, the Pfizer and Moderna vaccines were deemed to be 95% effective, so risk of Covid has not dropped to zero.

Expand full comment

We all still wear masks where appropriate and continue to be very cautious. We’ve come too far to blow it now! By early April and being fully vaccinated, the risk of serious illness, hospitalization, or death is greatly diminished. It is a relief to not have that constantly on one’s mind and being able to hold the grand-baby born a year ago!

Expand full comment

My husband and i get our second shots tomorrow! I’ll see my grandchildren at Easter. Planning festive Easter dinner and Easter egg hunt for the kids. Can’t wait to have everyone here, after missing Thanksgiving and Christmas. A Resurrection and many smaller resurrections.

Expand full comment

Good for you Marcy — I’m getting psyched up for some normalcy too

Expand full comment

Yes! So eager to hug my 15 month old grandson for the 1st time! Stay safe!

Expand full comment

How wonderful! Happy Grandparenting!

Expand full comment

Me neither but it must be remembered that this vaccine neither stops you getting the bug nor you giving it to others. It is very welcome as it prevents the severe problems but doesn't obviate the need for masks, handwashing and distancing.

Expand full comment