This Letter is why we wake from our sleep to read your work. How you link threads, determine which is credible and which not, and cut through clickbait and overwrought headlines to help us track threats to democracy. Every. F#$&ing. Day. Is heroic. Thank you.
This is a whole lot of crazy to unpack. What's so troubling to me is how easily people are led astray, or worse, willingly choose to believe, by Trump's rants without seeking any further clarification.
I live in an affluent zip code. My immediate community is well educated and, on the surface, successful in many business and professional fields. Yet, in the largest of four blue SMSAs in an historically red state, Trump voters outnumber others by about 4:1. Among my friends are many parents, especially fathers, of daughters. These people were first in line to help me after a bad cancer diagnosis a couple years back. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out Trump's appeal. They'd swear they're drawn by economic policies but I find that hard to believe given that None of these people suffered under Onama's Administration, despite the impact of the 2008 financial crisis which, of course, predated Obama's election.
It's virtually impossible to get a straight answer from them. Few will outright defend Trump, but revert to Obama or Hillary or somesuch non-response. Despite appearances to the contrary I'm left to conclude there's more racism and misogyny than I'd care to admit.
Kamala Harris was in town yesterday. Trump was here as well, less than 15 miles away. The text threads were full of pro Trump memes and pictures of Diamond and Silk, as well as nasty memes of Harris and Biden.
I'd hate to walk away from relationships with people who I'd trust with my life but not with my country, but it's coming to that. Their tacit approval of all Trump has done beyond economics (read tax cuts and deregulation) isn't something I can look past while making nice at a golf or club event.
Will they still agitate for Trumpist goals if/when Biden is elected, or will they revert to being "fiscal conservatives" without all the baggage of implied hate, racism, and xenophobia? I don't know but I'm not sure I can wait to find out.
It is very strange how people cannot see his narcissism. How he is incapable of making a decision that does not personally benefit himself. I am not sure who would win if he had to choose between himself and his daughter. It's odd also how many people who are decent loving people and would not talk this way themselves forgive his hate speech and lies. Repeatedly.
IMHO he does not know love. May have never known it. Has no way to comprehend its power to heal anger, depression, and despair.
Biden , in contrast, has gone through the worst and came out of it with more love for others.
How people cannot distinguish that baffles me.
Vote for love and hope. Help someone else have better life today and tomorrow.
you nailed it. I'm over the "fiscal conservative" excuse. It's greed. It's the fear that they'll "lose" money, investments, etc. Yet no one can adequately explain his economic policies. It comes down to greed and not wanting to support "others" (racism).
Sometimes. But I know people who identify with Trump - who say "we were impeached, we were acquitted". When Trump talks about attacks on him being attacks on his supporters - at least some of them do feel that way. I have no idea how it happens, but I think there is more to it than greed.
He has done an incredible job in fusing his identity with theirs. He constantly conflates his supporters with country, flag, anthem and himself. He implies that he alone is standing between the anarchists and his followers. He also states that anarchists are trying to 'go through supporters' to get to him. So, just like the coward he is, he has conscripted followers to fight on his behalf. He has outsourced the fighting as he steps aside and has his army fight progressives, protestors, governors and the media, groups he has labeled as the enemy. Cult anyone?
Thank you Sheri for that excellent profile of #45’s appeal. I also found another article adding more elements of his apparently bullet-proof magnetism:
I have a history of dissidence and am a literal black sheep of my family. When I sent my mom a pic of my future wife in 1980, she sent it back saying “What makes you think I want a picture of your black woman.” I cut off communication with her until she came around 2 years later. I didn’t even know she was a racist until then and perhaps she deserved me as a son, who changed her attitude toward black ppl.
In the 1970s I dropped out of her mainstream culture and soon realized that in my journey thru this life I often found myself closer related to those I encountered than to those whose physical flesh I was born of and realized that my physical heritage was no more than a garment I was issued by others and not always of my style or fit. So, I feel no obligation to remain friends or even communicate with ppl who are racists, bigots, misogynists, xenophobes, homophobes or incurable sociopaths. It was not even a problem ending communication with a trump supporting co-worker & “friend” of 15 years in 2016 as well as a half-bro in Mississippi. Anyone who supports trump, supports all those things I abhor and there is no reason to associate with them.
Just want to let mom off the hook – she did later apologize to Brenda and came to SoFlo with my sister (the go-between) and visited us. We later visited her in Missouri. When my youngest grandson was 13, we took a rail trip around the Eastern U.S. and stayed at my mom’s when we visited St. Louis. I think she really saw that a 13-year-old black teen is the same as this white teen she had to endure. (My grandson is a nerd like me).
I had a similar experience with my mother and likewise have ended communication for the last 20 years. As a wise person once said, "Even the best of us cannot breath poison air".
I also know (and am gob-smacked by) people who say Trump is doing a great job and then cannot make a reasonable argument to back up their claims. I know I will sound like Pollyanna-in-Denial when I say that a helpful strategy, right now, is simply to let go of this very justified anger and frustration. It's affecting our mental health, not theirs. It's clear that nothing we say will convince dunderheads that Trump is not a stable genius -- he is a drunk driver steering his clown car right off a cliff (and they're in the backseat!). My approach to get through these last few weeks before the election is to trust that hard-working, ethical journalists will continue to report the facts. To trust that the few GOP standouts who we see inching away from Trump (e.g. Romney, Thune, etc.) are just the beginning. To trust that we will certainly see elected members of what once was the Grand Old Party rapidly put miles between themselves and Trump when (God-willing) he loses the election and they are lame ducks. Those of us who are privileged (in whatever way we define that) are called now to stand fast and hang onto the hope we felt in 2008 when Obama was elected. Like you, I do feel terribly discouraged. But I refuse to give in to despair or to let Trump and his stupid followers rent space in my brain. I try to accept that some people will never "get it" -- but that I don't have to stop talking to them (especially since some of them are in my family!). It is annoying in the extreme, but now I just limit my exchanges with them to relatively neutral subjects like, "How about that World Series!" or "Wow, that was some thunderstorm!" or "Your Halloween decorations this year are great!!"
Yesterday I posted a link to a video I think might help us, in Heather’s Herd, to better understand the opposite reactions of people to the same info. Here is the link:
I’m so pleased you like it and have become the charter member. Okay...about the pale purple baseball caps...?!!? Also, I think it’s time to discuss the dues!!! But seriously folks, I think the caps—in various colors—are a great idea, along with mugs. And tee shirts would be great, too, although a little out of season! Anyhoo...
Best explanation I’ve heard: It’s not so much that his supporters like Trump; it’s that they hate the people who hate Trump (urban, intellectuals, elites, etc. )
I work along with a lot of highly educated men in very well paid jobs. A LOT of these men, both young and old, are cynical and sarcastic, saying things like "bah, politicians, all politicians are the same. All are like Trump, no difference". "Both sides...". They will vote for Trump because they think it is good for their pocketbook and "he's a businessman..." (despite the fact he has bankrupted business after business). But what gets me is the faithlessness, the lack of belief in America, the complete and utter apathy. This is why I suspect your Trumpers will just shrug their shoulders and walk away--it is only a small group of Proud Boy types and Evangelists that think Trump is God and they need to push his agenda forever. Once out of power, Trump's going to lose interest too. I believe Facebook and the trolls in social media have done an extremely good job undermining people's belief in not just the government, but our Democratic systems. This is very much out of the Russian and Korean and Chinese dictator's playbook, to make people lose faith. What is stupid about all this is it really isn't as bad as claimed (or wasn't before Trump), and it is definitely NOT both sides doing the greatest damage and being incompetent to levels we have never seen before--this is outright corruption seeded throughout our institutions, and it needs to get ripped out completely. I work a lot with government agencies, and have seen it all through the years. Lazy, stubborn, people do exist. But they exist in Commercial companies as well, and get paid a lot more to do nothing. There are a majority of very dedicated people in government and public service who continue to press forward despite getting pissed on constantly by all these entitled, superior idiots. I say to hell with the cynics, the rest of us need to just put our heads down and go to work. I would like to see some serious journalism on just what social media did to people, enough so these guys will at least look foolish for their cynicism. However, I also don't think in the end people like this ever change, they are lost. Perhaps if they themselves are suddenly poor, or their health gets blown up by COVID-19. Then, like Chris Christie, they may decide to see a wee bit of light--but they will still cynically support the President, since their high opinion of themselves does not allow them to admit they made such a foolish mistake, that they got taken in.
"Ask any Mexican, any Puerto Rican, any black man, any poor person—ask the wretched how they fare in the halls of justice, and then you will know, not whether or not the country is just, but whether or not it has any love for justice, or any concept of it. It is certain, in any case, that ignorance, allied with power, is the most ferocious enemy justice can have."
—James A. Baldwin
“I love America more than any other country in the world and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.”
Love Baldwin's incisive analyses that cut through BS like a razor. Amazing man. I honestly believe that we would not have the Democracy we have today without Blacks and Women and immigrants of all races insisting on believing in America, often with far more intensity than most white men who had the vote alone in the first place. There was a lot of doubt when we were founded, after all, that this grand experiment would even work. And the reason Blacks and women and immigrants believe so much in Democracy? They have much more to lose if Democracy doesn't work out. As one of my American Jewish friends who is married to a Black who immigrated from Ethiopia, with several kids, said to me "We're not going anywhere. There's nowhere else to go." It's clumsy, clunky, and stumbling along. But it's ours. We'll take it and keep it and improve it, and the rest of the faithless can just continue to yawn and complain and pretend it doesn't matter. To hell with them.
This feels like a “I am a trump supporter because a republican is in the white house”. But if he is no longer in the White House on November 10, will they start throwing him under the bus?
I do NOT understand how women or parents of daughters support a man that has such a disregard for women. Females are either nasty or housewives in his view. So my question is - which is his daughter? She must be nasty because how could a housewife run such a successful business? Of course my tone her is utter sarcasm. I simply don’t understand the support. SMH. And of course, I don’t have to understand it.
You are absolutely right. This boils down to racism/prejudice, and misogyny being at the root of this support. His followers have been taught to fear 'other', and to be told their place in the hierarchy is threatened. If we removed racism/prejudice and misogyny from the mix and inserted an understanding that equality and equity actually serves society better, we'd see his numbers dwindle.
I suspect there will be some distancing from Trump, if not outright disavowal. I don't see how one can believe that, however, given their cheerleading over the past 4 years.
What I think we know now is that 1) there are many people who seem to be okay with a wannabe autocrat so long as it doesn't cost them money or directly affect their families, 2) they, like Trump, will gladly violate anti immigration rules if it benefits them with cheap labor, and 3) though they'd never say this, their anti democratic sentiments are never far beneath the surface.
Last thought, I cannot figure out what they tell their daughters, many of whom I know to be smart, accomplished students and professionals. Must be some interesting conversations around the table.
Your situation sounds very like my own. My take is that their personal world views are critically dependent on maintaing their delusion of being staunch Republicans with all the trappings of wealth and priviledge; they simply are not capable of questioning it. I feel like I am living alone in an alternate reality. Thankfully I have two dogs to keep me grounded.
Interesting point. I think that politicians who've supported him so long are stuck. Their entire relevance in the GOP is based on their support. They're so deep into this that there's no backing out. If he loses what do they have to hang their hat on? Nada.
In the Texas Senate race debate John Cornyn was asked what his greatest contribution to his constituents had been. He referred to a bill requiring more background checks for gun buyers after a massacre at a Texas church. More background checks? One of the most basic, most obvious things anyone could have done with all the shootings in the last number of years? And this from a Senator who received lots of money from the NRA over the years? That's nuts. Moreover, almost 40% of Texans polled didn't recognize his name.
That's the rank hypocrisy of the GOP. They accomplished absolutely nothing for the non-wealthy of this country while Trump's been president and they can't really defend him. I hope they all go down in flames.
The video of Biden reacting to Chris's son just.wrecked.me. How painfully I want this kind man to regain control of the executive is like a living thing running thru my veins, making me wake in a fever every morning around 5am...to read this newsletter. Thank you thank you thank you....
I saw a video in which Hixon's widow commented that it was an incredibly kind gesture and that, at a time when she couldn't give her son the attention he needed, Biden gave him reassurance and comfort. I was in tears watching it.
Yes, y'all, I saw clips from it last night on CNN. I'd check Youtube, and if you find it, believe me, it is worth the search. He REALLY tore into Trump in ways I have never heard. Reporters last night said it is unprecedented in modern times that an ex-President has ever publicly berated and attacked their successor to this degree. It was delicious. Obama obviously has been sitting back for the past 4 years watching his legacy ruined and listening to a President* insult him and run him down. He is FINALLY letting it all out, and it's about damned time! He nails it. I'm glad he's in the fray for the next couple weeks!!
*I always use an asterisk to describe this President* as it means, "in name only."
Thank you, HCR! It’s an avalanche of news. These are my secular prayers: I’m praying that Biden keeps his cool tonight. I’m praying that I never have to see or hear Trump, McConnell and Barr after January 2021. I’m praying that we all vote and help get out the vote for BidenHarris and to flip the Senate. Finally, I’m praying for my country and all of us who have been hurt in so many ways during the Covid Era and the Orange Clown’s presidency. Let’s get this done and over with. Vota. Vote. ❤️🤍💙
Thanks Heather for this recap of a roller coaster day. Filled with "what the absolute hell Rudy", to a truly fantastic speech from President Obama. I watched the speech, or more so a dress down of a current President by a former President live. My understanding is that has not happened before or atleast to that degree. We heard President Obama say what we all think but don't have the venue to express it. I've said it before, but what do other countries think when they see this uber corrupt, outrageous Administration with its daily foray of bullshit? I can only imagine what the Trump show will bring for tonight. Get out the popcorn.
2 years ago we we in England and Ireland for visits. I can tell you what they think of our current 'president'...they call him the "Twitter Twat"...I have a picture of the poster. To them, he is laughable. We were actually asked why we would bring someone "like that" into office. We were quick to say we didn't vote for him, and then the REAL opinions came out, and they were not kind to Trump.
Twitter Twat nails it. We have been held hostage by insane tweets For too many years. No policies, no bilateral input in government, just the morning tweet which the media expands upon all day. Tweets and executive orders by this lazy crazy are the 4 most backward years in our history. The long list of his attempts to hijack the election are treason.
Alexander, I have friends that live in other countries and every single one of them cannot understand how this Country fell so quickly or why we put up with this Administration.
I have watched the video of Biden comforting Hixon's son multiple times through tears. Good Lord willing that our country be a worthy recipient of such a compassionate and caring person as our leader.
I have not seen the video, but found I had tears in my eyes just reading Heather’s description. My heart longs for both intelligence AND compassion in the White House.
I heard Matthew Dowd on TV this morning. He compared listening to Biden as “easy listening” and tRump as “heavy metal”. People are ready to change the channel to easy listening and won’t want to change back.
Appreciate your good work. I find comfort in the fact America has survived other crazy administrations. I’m reading Wounded Knee: the Political road to an American Massacre, aloud to my 12 & 14 year old grandchildren. They are staying involved and I have been impressed with the parallels to today’s administration, especially the packing of agencies with political cronies.
I live in NC and the early voting has been unprecedented. I’m hopeful for the outcome.
As trump more and more drills holes in the bottom of his own life raft the harder and harder his supporters try to bail him out. I am still running across people whose only reason (excuse) to vote for him is because "he doesn't kill unborn babies". ssmmmhhh. I am just waiting for someone like Hannity or Limbaugh to say that the video of Biden comforting that young man shows him molesting a minor. To see and hear president Obama sounding like what he was and still is .. a leader...was a breath of fresh air and reminded me of what coherent sentences and well thought out points of discussion actually sound like.
Keep up the great work Prof Heather and thank you for being a candle in this darkness.
Yes, there is a lot of that insanity running around - generally from people who are just fine looking past children ripped from their parents and kept in cages, people of all ages dying of coronavirus because the federal response was worse than nothing, etc, etc.
Yes, that alone brings anger to me and makes my blood boil! How is it they cannot see or do not wish to see how we, as a nation who used to accept nearly everyone who was running away from their country's cruelties, condone what atrocities we have committed?
I would like to see a retired OPM executive give their take on today's executive order. It is convoluted to read and you'd have to be an expert in civil service statutes and regulations to understand its potential effect. Coming from Trump's sycophants it is almost certainly sinister.
I have a client whose husband she says is a Drumph supporter. When I asked the question, why, she responded, he doesn’t want socialism. My response was number one, we already have socialism except that the money goes to support the 1%.
Then what she explained was not socialism but his confusion with communism.
I give up. We need to educate our population. The ignorance and misinformation is so dangerous.
When a community of people support a dim witted, criminal, inarticulate dope into the White House we are in serious serious trouble.
I really really like Joe Biden. For a while, many liberal friends have said they didn't like Biden but would vote against Trump. I have always said, I am voting FOR Joe Biden. He has made mistakes in his life and career, and he doesn't always go as far left as I would like, but he is a good man and public servant. I cannot wait for him to be our President!
I have a cousin whom I used to say had “drunk the kool-aid”. I now say that she bathes in the stuff. She is an influential author and speaker, and has many “followers”. 😩
Taken from her Facebook page yesterday: “The owner of a small repair shop is going to save the republic. God truly does work in mysterious ways. “ (no, she was not being sarcastic) and advised her friends/followers “the laptop from hell. Watch the white house channel and newsmax/OANN/Rush Limbaugh because the corrupt news news won’t cover this and it is incredibly damaging. “
I have no words, and realize how deeply “his” followers have been indoctrinated in to the cult that is trumpism.
I spent my whole hour with my therapist yesterday talking about the fear I have living in a society with people who would vote for such a person. I feel like an outlier and I feel like I have no home anymore.
I feel for your thoughts Elaine and ..... if I may,
please try some Thich Nhat Hanh - a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, whom Rev. Martin Luther King nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, during the Vietnam War. He is nearing death after his 94th birthday in his native Vietnam, tho he spent most of his adult years in exile in southern France. Plum Village is the name of his monastery in France.
I highly recommend his book “Peace Is Every Step”. His books are everywhere.
Ah so many jewels, but this I may offer --- at his monastery in NY and France, and elsewhere, attendees stop and silently, deeply listen to the bell at the top of each hour ... four blocks from my home, the old New England chapel rings each hour, and .... we stop, breathe deeply, and have gratitude for this moment. THIS moment, “ahhh"
OK, one other jewel. He recommends one disassociate from the feelings of anger, jealousy, fear, etc --- I will say to myself, “Oh, I see you ‘fear', I am here for you. I will care for you, and I know I am well and safe. But thank you for appearing”. Then I will have deep breaths, and relax into this present moment. And I may then thank the fear
btw, one can refer to this diminutive saint as “Thay”, pronounced “thai” - or “teacher” in Vietnamese. Well, I hope this is helpful, and not too much, but just right.
You are not an outlier. You are with us. You are standing up for sanity, decency, and honesty. Remember, all that is required for evil to flourish is for the good to remain quiet. This is a time to stand tall.
Before I retired I was a therapist. I can’t imagine how I would be able to do that work give. I feel the same fear and a Jett you describe. Stay strong.
I’m trying. I’m a very strong person but this is terrifying. This is why I look forward to not only this newsletter but the posts from intelligent articulate people. It calms my nervous system.
This Letter is why we wake from our sleep to read your work. How you link threads, determine which is credible and which not, and cut through clickbait and overwrought headlines to help us track threats to democracy. Every. F#$&ing. Day. Is heroic. Thank you.
Every single word of this!
Amen *and* hallelujah!
Thank you Heather. Stay strong. We are going to need it after November 3rd. Either way.
Amen!
Double Amen!
Triple Amen and hallelujah!
Exactly!
This one brought me to tears- good ones. ❤️💥HCR!
Absolutely correct.
True. Thanks, Linda.
Check!
This is a whole lot of crazy to unpack. What's so troubling to me is how easily people are led astray, or worse, willingly choose to believe, by Trump's rants without seeking any further clarification.
I live in an affluent zip code. My immediate community is well educated and, on the surface, successful in many business and professional fields. Yet, in the largest of four blue SMSAs in an historically red state, Trump voters outnumber others by about 4:1. Among my friends are many parents, especially fathers, of daughters. These people were first in line to help me after a bad cancer diagnosis a couple years back. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out Trump's appeal. They'd swear they're drawn by economic policies but I find that hard to believe given that None of these people suffered under Onama's Administration, despite the impact of the 2008 financial crisis which, of course, predated Obama's election.
It's virtually impossible to get a straight answer from them. Few will outright defend Trump, but revert to Obama or Hillary or somesuch non-response. Despite appearances to the contrary I'm left to conclude there's more racism and misogyny than I'd care to admit.
Kamala Harris was in town yesterday. Trump was here as well, less than 15 miles away. The text threads were full of pro Trump memes and pictures of Diamond and Silk, as well as nasty memes of Harris and Biden.
I'd hate to walk away from relationships with people who I'd trust with my life but not with my country, but it's coming to that. Their tacit approval of all Trump has done beyond economics (read tax cuts and deregulation) isn't something I can look past while making nice at a golf or club event.
Will they still agitate for Trumpist goals if/when Biden is elected, or will they revert to being "fiscal conservatives" without all the baggage of implied hate, racism, and xenophobia? I don't know but I'm not sure I can wait to find out.
It is very strange how people cannot see his narcissism. How he is incapable of making a decision that does not personally benefit himself. I am not sure who would win if he had to choose between himself and his daughter. It's odd also how many people who are decent loving people and would not talk this way themselves forgive his hate speech and lies. Repeatedly.
IMHO he does not know love. May have never known it. Has no way to comprehend its power to heal anger, depression, and despair.
Biden , in contrast, has gone through the worst and came out of it with more love for others.
How people cannot distinguish that baffles me.
Vote for love and hope. Help someone else have better life today and tomorrow.
you nailed it. I'm over the "fiscal conservative" excuse. It's greed. It's the fear that they'll "lose" money, investments, etc. Yet no one can adequately explain his economic policies. It comes down to greed and not wanting to support "others" (racism).
Julie Pryor, exactly! It is all about greed!
Sometimes. But I know people who identify with Trump - who say "we were impeached, we were acquitted". When Trump talks about attacks on him being attacks on his supporters - at least some of them do feel that way. I have no idea how it happens, but I think there is more to it than greed.
He has done an incredible job in fusing his identity with theirs. He constantly conflates his supporters with country, flag, anthem and himself. He implies that he alone is standing between the anarchists and his followers. He also states that anarchists are trying to 'go through supporters' to get to him. So, just like the coward he is, he has conscripted followers to fight on his behalf. He has outsourced the fighting as he steps aside and has his army fight progressives, protestors, governors and the media, groups he has labeled as the enemy. Cult anyone?
Thank you Sheri for that excellent profile of #45’s appeal. I also found another article adding more elements of his apparently bullet-proof magnetism:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mind-in-the-machine/201609/the-psychology-behind-donald-trumps-unwavering-support
Thank you Bill. I have been thinking a LOT about this aspect of his reptilian magnetism. And my apologies to reptiles.
I have a history of dissidence and am a literal black sheep of my family. When I sent my mom a pic of my future wife in 1980, she sent it back saying “What makes you think I want a picture of your black woman.” I cut off communication with her until she came around 2 years later. I didn’t even know she was a racist until then and perhaps she deserved me as a son, who changed her attitude toward black ppl.
In the 1970s I dropped out of her mainstream culture and soon realized that in my journey thru this life I often found myself closer related to those I encountered than to those whose physical flesh I was born of and realized that my physical heritage was no more than a garment I was issued by others and not always of my style or fit. So, I feel no obligation to remain friends or even communicate with ppl who are racists, bigots, misogynists, xenophobes, homophobes or incurable sociopaths. It was not even a problem ending communication with a trump supporting co-worker & “friend” of 15 years in 2016 as well as a half-bro in Mississippi. Anyone who supports trump, supports all those things I abhor and there is no reason to associate with them.
Just want to let mom off the hook – she did later apologize to Brenda and came to SoFlo with my sister (the go-between) and visited us. We later visited her in Missouri. When my youngest grandson was 13, we took a rail trip around the Eastern U.S. and stayed at my mom’s when we visited St. Louis. I think she really saw that a 13-year-old black teen is the same as this white teen she had to endure. (My grandson is a nerd like me).
My Extended Family (for those on twitter)
https://twitter.com/roboyte/status/1319379432566644736?s=20
What a terrible thing to be told by your mother - or anyone! Well said post!
I had a similar experience with my mother and likewise have ended communication for the last 20 years. As a wise person once said, "Even the best of us cannot breath poison air".
I wish more people had your strength. Squishy liberals who can justify being friends with trump supporters are simply enabling them.
I also know (and am gob-smacked by) people who say Trump is doing a great job and then cannot make a reasonable argument to back up their claims. I know I will sound like Pollyanna-in-Denial when I say that a helpful strategy, right now, is simply to let go of this very justified anger and frustration. It's affecting our mental health, not theirs. It's clear that nothing we say will convince dunderheads that Trump is not a stable genius -- he is a drunk driver steering his clown car right off a cliff (and they're in the backseat!). My approach to get through these last few weeks before the election is to trust that hard-working, ethical journalists will continue to report the facts. To trust that the few GOP standouts who we see inching away from Trump (e.g. Romney, Thune, etc.) are just the beginning. To trust that we will certainly see elected members of what once was the Grand Old Party rapidly put miles between themselves and Trump when (God-willing) he loses the election and they are lame ducks. Those of us who are privileged (in whatever way we define that) are called now to stand fast and hang onto the hope we felt in 2008 when Obama was elected. Like you, I do feel terribly discouraged. But I refuse to give in to despair or to let Trump and his stupid followers rent space in my brain. I try to accept that some people will never "get it" -- but that I don't have to stop talking to them (especially since some of them are in my family!). It is annoying in the extreme, but now I just limit my exchanges with them to relatively neutral subjects like, "How about that World Series!" or "Wow, that was some thunderstorm!" or "Your Halloween decorations this year are great!!"
Hey, Rev.Judith, I agree with all you say here. Especially enamored with not letting these folks "rent space in my brain!"
Lynell Abbott, it sure is a wearisome time... :-/
Yesterday I posted a link to a video I think might help us, in Heather’s Herd, to better understand the opposite reactions of people to the same info. Here is the link:
https://youtu.be/W4eS2E-PoGo
I hope this helps.
"Heather's Herd" !!! I love it !!!! Can we get some pale purple baseball caps with that slogan embroidered on the front?? Or at least a coffee mug...
I’m so pleased you like it and have become the charter member. Okay...about the pale purple baseball caps...?!!? Also, I think it’s time to discuss the dues!!! But seriously folks, I think the caps—in various colors—are a great idea, along with mugs. And tee shirts would be great, too, although a little out of season! Anyhoo...
Thanks Bill, that was a well thought out presentation.
Hey Bill. I finally got a chance to watch this video you shared. Very well done presentation, thank you!
And that’s all the energy they deserve unfortunately
Best explanation I’ve heard: It’s not so much that his supporters like Trump; it’s that they hate the people who hate Trump (urban, intellectuals, elites, etc. )
“...rent space in my brain“ !!! 🙏🏼😂
I'm seeing similar behavior among those "friends" who are well-heeled. It is confounding. Thank you for sharing.
I work along with a lot of highly educated men in very well paid jobs. A LOT of these men, both young and old, are cynical and sarcastic, saying things like "bah, politicians, all politicians are the same. All are like Trump, no difference". "Both sides...". They will vote for Trump because they think it is good for their pocketbook and "he's a businessman..." (despite the fact he has bankrupted business after business). But what gets me is the faithlessness, the lack of belief in America, the complete and utter apathy. This is why I suspect your Trumpers will just shrug their shoulders and walk away--it is only a small group of Proud Boy types and Evangelists that think Trump is God and they need to push his agenda forever. Once out of power, Trump's going to lose interest too. I believe Facebook and the trolls in social media have done an extremely good job undermining people's belief in not just the government, but our Democratic systems. This is very much out of the Russian and Korean and Chinese dictator's playbook, to make people lose faith. What is stupid about all this is it really isn't as bad as claimed (or wasn't before Trump), and it is definitely NOT both sides doing the greatest damage and being incompetent to levels we have never seen before--this is outright corruption seeded throughout our institutions, and it needs to get ripped out completely. I work a lot with government agencies, and have seen it all through the years. Lazy, stubborn, people do exist. But they exist in Commercial companies as well, and get paid a lot more to do nothing. There are a majority of very dedicated people in government and public service who continue to press forward despite getting pissed on constantly by all these entitled, superior idiots. I say to hell with the cynics, the rest of us need to just put our heads down and go to work. I would like to see some serious journalism on just what social media did to people, enough so these guys will at least look foolish for their cynicism. However, I also don't think in the end people like this ever change, they are lost. Perhaps if they themselves are suddenly poor, or their health gets blown up by COVID-19. Then, like Chris Christie, they may decide to see a wee bit of light--but they will still cynically support the President, since their high opinion of themselves does not allow them to admit they made such a foolish mistake, that they got taken in.
James Baldwin generally helps.
"Ask any Mexican, any Puerto Rican, any black man, any poor person—ask the wretched how they fare in the halls of justice, and then you will know, not whether or not the country is just, but whether or not it has any love for justice, or any concept of it. It is certain, in any case, that ignorance, allied with power, is the most ferocious enemy justice can have."
—James A. Baldwin
“I love America more than any other country in the world and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.”
― James Baldwin
Love Baldwin's incisive analyses that cut through BS like a razor. Amazing man. I honestly believe that we would not have the Democracy we have today without Blacks and Women and immigrants of all races insisting on believing in America, often with far more intensity than most white men who had the vote alone in the first place. There was a lot of doubt when we were founded, after all, that this grand experiment would even work. And the reason Blacks and women and immigrants believe so much in Democracy? They have much more to lose if Democracy doesn't work out. As one of my American Jewish friends who is married to a Black who immigrated from Ethiopia, with several kids, said to me "We're not going anywhere. There's nowhere else to go." It's clumsy, clunky, and stumbling along. But it's ours. We'll take it and keep it and improve it, and the rest of the faithless can just continue to yawn and complain and pretend it doesn't matter. To hell with them.
This feels like a “I am a trump supporter because a republican is in the white house”. But if he is no longer in the White House on November 10, will they start throwing him under the bus?
I do NOT understand how women or parents of daughters support a man that has such a disregard for women. Females are either nasty or housewives in his view. So my question is - which is his daughter? She must be nasty because how could a housewife run such a successful business? Of course my tone her is utter sarcasm. I simply don’t understand the support. SMH. And of course, I don’t have to understand it.
You are absolutely right. This boils down to racism/prejudice, and misogyny being at the root of this support. His followers have been taught to fear 'other', and to be told their place in the hierarchy is threatened. If we removed racism/prejudice and misogyny from the mix and inserted an understanding that equality and equity actually serves society better, we'd see his numbers dwindle.
🤷♀️
I suspect there will be some distancing from Trump, if not outright disavowal. I don't see how one can believe that, however, given their cheerleading over the past 4 years.
What I think we know now is that 1) there are many people who seem to be okay with a wannabe autocrat so long as it doesn't cost them money or directly affect their families, 2) they, like Trump, will gladly violate anti immigration rules if it benefits them with cheap labor, and 3) though they'd never say this, their anti democratic sentiments are never far beneath the surface.
Last thought, I cannot figure out what they tell their daughters, many of whom I know to be smart, accomplished students and professionals. Must be some interesting conversations around the table.
Your situation sounds very like my own. My take is that their personal world views are critically dependent on maintaing their delusion of being staunch Republicans with all the trappings of wealth and priviledge; they simply are not capable of questioning it. I feel like I am living alone in an alternate reality. Thankfully I have two dogs to keep me grounded.
Interesting point. I think that politicians who've supported him so long are stuck. Their entire relevance in the GOP is based on their support. They're so deep into this that there's no backing out. If he loses what do they have to hang their hat on? Nada.
In the Texas Senate race debate John Cornyn was asked what his greatest contribution to his constituents had been. He referred to a bill requiring more background checks for gun buyers after a massacre at a Texas church. More background checks? One of the most basic, most obvious things anyone could have done with all the shootings in the last number of years? And this from a Senator who received lots of money from the NRA over the years? That's nuts. Moreover, almost 40% of Texans polled didn't recognize his name.
That's the rank hypocrisy of the GOP. They accomplished absolutely nothing for the non-wealthy of this country while Trump's been president and they can't really defend him. I hope they all go down in flames.
The video of Biden reacting to Chris's son just.wrecked.me. How painfully I want this kind man to regain control of the executive is like a living thing running thru my veins, making me wake in a fever every morning around 5am...to read this newsletter. Thank you thank you thank you....
I saw a video in which Hixon's widow commented that it was an incredibly kind gesture and that, at a time when she couldn't give her son the attention he needed, Biden gave him reassurance and comfort. I was in tears watching it.
Leadership draws upon character and the culmination of many small but relevant actions.
Yes, y'all, I saw clips from it last night on CNN. I'd check Youtube, and if you find it, believe me, it is worth the search. He REALLY tore into Trump in ways I have never heard. Reporters last night said it is unprecedented in modern times that an ex-President has ever publicly berated and attacked their successor to this degree. It was delicious. Obama obviously has been sitting back for the past 4 years watching his legacy ruined and listening to a President* insult him and run him down. He is FINALLY letting it all out, and it's about damned time! He nails it. I'm glad he's in the fray for the next couple weeks!!
*I always use an asterisk to describe this President* as it means, "in name only."
President Obama ripped the "Mango Menace" a new one! I did not see the whole thing, however the clips I saw were spot on.
I can barely write the Asswipe's name, & then it is tRump.
I watched it twice it was that good! It's on Youtube in many places in its entirety
Hey, Bruce. Missed you these past few days. Thanks for the heads-up. I will look for his speech forthwith!
Thank you, HCR! It’s an avalanche of news. These are my secular prayers: I’m praying that Biden keeps his cool tonight. I’m praying that I never have to see or hear Trump, McConnell and Barr after January 2021. I’m praying that we all vote and help get out the vote for BidenHarris and to flip the Senate. Finally, I’m praying for my country and all of us who have been hurt in so many ways during the Covid Era and the Orange Clown’s presidency. Let’s get this done and over with. Vota. Vote. ❤️🤍💙
Thanks Heather for this recap of a roller coaster day. Filled with "what the absolute hell Rudy", to a truly fantastic speech from President Obama. I watched the speech, or more so a dress down of a current President by a former President live. My understanding is that has not happened before or atleast to that degree. We heard President Obama say what we all think but don't have the venue to express it. I've said it before, but what do other countries think when they see this uber corrupt, outrageous Administration with its daily foray of bullshit? I can only imagine what the Trump show will bring for tonight. Get out the popcorn.
2 years ago we we in England and Ireland for visits. I can tell you what they think of our current 'president'...they call him the "Twitter Twat"...I have a picture of the poster. To them, he is laughable. We were actually asked why we would bring someone "like that" into office. We were quick to say we didn't vote for him, and then the REAL opinions came out, and they were not kind to Trump.
If there was someway we could shut down his twitter account after November 4th, I think the world would be a much safer place.
Send them a picture of Boris with a note: "thinking of you" ...
Twitter Twat nails it. We have been held hostage by insane tweets For too many years. No policies, no bilateral input in government, just the morning tweet which the media expands upon all day. Tweets and executive orders by this lazy crazy are the 4 most backward years in our history. The long list of his attempts to hijack the election are treason.
Alexander, I have friends that live in other countries and every single one of them cannot understand how this Country fell so quickly or why we put up with this Administration.
Or...Get out the barf bags.
I have watched the video of Biden comforting Hixon's son multiple times through tears. Good Lord willing that our country be a worthy recipient of such a compassionate and caring person as our leader.
I have not seen the video, but found I had tears in my eyes just reading Heather’s description. My heart longs for both intelligence AND compassion in the White House.
Please, let it be so. ❤️
I heard Matthew Dowd on TV this morning. He compared listening to Biden as “easy listening” and tRump as “heavy metal”. People are ready to change the channel to easy listening and won’t want to change back.
That is a very good way to put it!!
Appreciate your good work. I find comfort in the fact America has survived other crazy administrations. I’m reading Wounded Knee: the Political road to an American Massacre, aloud to my 12 & 14 year old grandchildren. They are staying involved and I have been impressed with the parallels to today’s administration, especially the packing of agencies with political cronies.
I live in NC and the early voting has been unprecedented. I’m hopeful for the outcome.
Beautifully done! You are tracking "a 30-ring circus," and doing so with bravado, pizzaz, and great insight! Thanks!
"30-ring circus" indeed!
As trump more and more drills holes in the bottom of his own life raft the harder and harder his supporters try to bail him out. I am still running across people whose only reason (excuse) to vote for him is because "he doesn't kill unborn babies". ssmmmhhh. I am just waiting for someone like Hannity or Limbaugh to say that the video of Biden comforting that young man shows him molesting a minor. To see and hear president Obama sounding like what he was and still is .. a leader...was a breath of fresh air and reminded me of what coherent sentences and well thought out points of discussion actually sound like.
Keep up the great work Prof Heather and thank you for being a candle in this darkness.
Love that metaphor "drills holes in the bottom of his own life raft" !!!! :-) Thanks!
and I love the metaphor a “candle in the darkness"
Yes, there is a lot of that insanity running around - generally from people who are just fine looking past children ripped from their parents and kept in cages, people of all ages dying of coronavirus because the federal response was worse than nothing, etc, etc.
Yes, that alone brings anger to me and makes my blood boil! How is it they cannot see or do not wish to see how we, as a nation who used to accept nearly everyone who was running away from their country's cruelties, condone what atrocities we have committed?
Tyranny vs humanity was on display today and you captured it to perfection!
I would like to see a retired OPM executive give their take on today's executive order. It is convoluted to read and you'd have to be an expert in civil service statutes and regulations to understand its potential effect. Coming from Trump's sycophants it is almost certainly sinister.
I would hope the Biden attorneys would have a plan already to reverse that one on Jan.22.
I have a client whose husband she says is a Drumph supporter. When I asked the question, why, she responded, he doesn’t want socialism. My response was number one, we already have socialism except that the money goes to support the 1%.
Then what she explained was not socialism but his confusion with communism.
I give up. We need to educate our population. The ignorance and misinformation is so dangerous.
When a community of people support a dim witted, criminal, inarticulate dope into the White House we are in serious serious trouble.
I really really like Joe Biden. For a while, many liberal friends have said they didn't like Biden but would vote against Trump. I have always said, I am voting FOR Joe Biden. He has made mistakes in his life and career, and he doesn't always go as far left as I would like, but he is a good man and public servant. I cannot wait for him to be our President!
I have a cousin whom I used to say had “drunk the kool-aid”. I now say that she bathes in the stuff. She is an influential author and speaker, and has many “followers”. 😩
Taken from her Facebook page yesterday: “The owner of a small repair shop is going to save the republic. God truly does work in mysterious ways. “ (no, she was not being sarcastic) and advised her friends/followers “the laptop from hell. Watch the white house channel and newsmax/OANN/Rush Limbaugh because the corrupt news news won’t cover this and it is incredibly damaging. “
I have no words, and realize how deeply “his” followers have been indoctrinated in to the cult that is trumpism.
It makes me so sad, and terrified.
I spent my whole hour with my therapist yesterday talking about the fear I have living in a society with people who would vote for such a person. I feel like an outlier and I feel like I have no home anymore.
I feel for your thoughts Elaine and ..... if I may,
please try some Thich Nhat Hanh - a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, whom Rev. Martin Luther King nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, during the Vietnam War. He is nearing death after his 94th birthday in his native Vietnam, tho he spent most of his adult years in exile in southern France. Plum Village is the name of his monastery in France.
I highly recommend his book “Peace Is Every Step”. His books are everywhere.
Ah so many jewels, but this I may offer --- at his monastery in NY and France, and elsewhere, attendees stop and silently, deeply listen to the bell at the top of each hour ... four blocks from my home, the old New England chapel rings each hour, and .... we stop, breathe deeply, and have gratitude for this moment. THIS moment, “ahhh"
OK, one other jewel. He recommends one disassociate from the feelings of anger, jealousy, fear, etc --- I will say to myself, “Oh, I see you ‘fear', I am here for you. I will care for you, and I know I am well and safe. But thank you for appearing”. Then I will have deep breaths, and relax into this present moment. And I may then thank the fear
btw, one can refer to this diminutive saint as “Thay”, pronounced “thai” - or “teacher” in Vietnamese. Well, I hope this is helpful, and not too much, but just right.
I know Hahn well. I need to remember to talk to the emotions as they appear. Thank you.
I’m happy you understood my post. I also need to remember, all too often
You are not an outlier. You are with us. You are standing up for sanity, decency, and honesty. Remember, all that is required for evil to flourish is for the good to remain quiet. This is a time to stand tall.
Before I retired I was a therapist. I can’t imagine how I would be able to do that work give. I feel the same fear and a Jett you describe. Stay strong.
I’m trying. I’m a very strong person but this is terrifying. This is why I look forward to not only this newsletter but the posts from intelligent articulate people. It calms my nervous system.
Sorry about the many typos in my last response. Don't know how Jett replaced anxiety. And, yes, the folks here are intelligent and articulate.
Dr. R, when do you ever sleep? Inquiring minds want to know!