J As I became considerably older, I find that often people with questions about their lives often benefit most by having a good listener. And while listening, they can say ‘uh uh,’ ‘that’s interesting,’ and ‘could you elaborate.
Once you became a passive listener, the other person becomes increasingly comfortable in discussing her/his sit…
J As I became considerably older, I find that often people with questions about their lives often benefit most by having a good listener. And while listening, they can say ‘uh uh,’ ‘that’s interesting,’ and ‘could you elaborate.
Once you became a passive listener, the other person becomes increasingly comfortable in discussing her/his situation. Instead of endeavoring to provide ‘answers,’ asking questions may be what the individual most needs.
And who has the ‘answers?’ If we can help a person probe more into themselves, this might lead to the ‘least worst alternative.’
My wife and I practiced this with our daughter this afternoon as she is considering major surgery. We felt it important tab at she decide what was best with her body (she’s 51). We feel that she is on track towards a resolution that suits her.
Sounds like a good strategy and one that ensures she knows she has your support. God be with her in making the decision and with all of you for a positive outcome.
Except for those of us who aren't believers. It is a puzzle that people "believe" in this god who is all powerful but stands by while the suffering continues worldwide- suffering that he/she could have prevented. Either that god is omnipotent but callous because he/she/it creates all the suffering and doesn't intervene to stop it or isn't omnipotent but claims he/she/it is, so is lying. And, if that god is also omniscient, then all that suffering could also have been prevented ahead of time by just changing the course of how things unfold. If that god is omniscient, then everything has already been determined, so there is no free will, which means that the idea that all of this is "given" to us to challenge us, is moot, since it's already written what will happen. It's truly a puzzle.
This puzzle is not one to believers and is inexplicable to non-believers. For me at least it's not an issue because the teachings of Jesus are valuable whether one accepts the idea of an all-powerful God or not. Loving one's neighbor and treating them as one would like to be treated isn't all that challenging to accept; much more difficult to live by.
Of course. But some of us don't need another's "teachings" to come to this conclusion on our own. Of course, loving is better than hating, for both those we love and for ourselves. Hate is like taking poison hoping the other person will die.
An excellent simile. People who are confident in their own judgement will, as you say, reach their own conclusions; others, not as confident or experienced in making judgments, need a guide which could be you, could be me, could be Jesus or another prophet. The path isn't as important as the goal and one of the issues of contemporary churches is they've become focused on the path and the attendant temporal, secular power and money that can come with it instead of their notional primary role.
J I have been associated with something called THIS I BELIEVE since 1950. It was initiated with Edward R. Murrow, broadcast on CBS to 39 million listeners weekly and was, I believe, the best selling nonfiction book in 1952.
Check it out on Wickipedia. Also, www.thisibelieve.org It is non religious. Indeed, the TIBs in recent years have mentioned a god far less than in the 1950s.
My TIB was broadcast on CBS in 1954 and printed in newspapers. When I became a history professor in 1992m I incorporated TIB in my curriculum. A number of students told me that this was their most meaningful college experience.
I have conducted 10 4-6 week TIB programs in NJ and NY. A great majority of the participants, after listening and discussing other TIBs, venture to write their own TIBs. A meaningful experience.
I have also been involved with Eisenhower Fellows since its inception in 1953. Eisenhowerfellowships.org. I was the stimulus for an EisenhowerFellowship/This I Believe book in 2016. None of the 34 published Fellows’ TIBs focused on ‘god.’
As a psychotherapist, I understood that this is a major skill to have, to be helpful to others. We can't "fix" others with our advice, but we certainly can join people in their journeys, making sure to not be another obstacle for them, but instead a support.
J As I became considerably older, I find that often people with questions about their lives often benefit most by having a good listener. And while listening, they can say ‘uh uh,’ ‘that’s interesting,’ and ‘could you elaborate.
Once you became a passive listener, the other person becomes increasingly comfortable in discussing her/his situation. Instead of endeavoring to provide ‘answers,’ asking questions may be what the individual most needs.
And who has the ‘answers?’ If we can help a person probe more into themselves, this might lead to the ‘least worst alternative.’
My wife and I practiced this with our daughter this afternoon as she is considering major surgery. We felt it important tab at she decide what was best with her body (she’s 51). We feel that she is on track towards a resolution that suits her.
Sounds like a good strategy and one that ensures she knows she has your support. God be with her in making the decision and with all of you for a positive outcome.
Except for those of us who aren't believers. It is a puzzle that people "believe" in this god who is all powerful but stands by while the suffering continues worldwide- suffering that he/she could have prevented. Either that god is omnipotent but callous because he/she/it creates all the suffering and doesn't intervene to stop it or isn't omnipotent but claims he/she/it is, so is lying. And, if that god is also omniscient, then all that suffering could also have been prevented ahead of time by just changing the course of how things unfold. If that god is omniscient, then everything has already been determined, so there is no free will, which means that the idea that all of this is "given" to us to challenge us, is moot, since it's already written what will happen. It's truly a puzzle.
This puzzle is not one to believers and is inexplicable to non-believers. For me at least it's not an issue because the teachings of Jesus are valuable whether one accepts the idea of an all-powerful God or not. Loving one's neighbor and treating them as one would like to be treated isn't all that challenging to accept; much more difficult to live by.
Of course. But some of us don't need another's "teachings" to come to this conclusion on our own. Of course, loving is better than hating, for both those we love and for ourselves. Hate is like taking poison hoping the other person will die.
An excellent simile. People who are confident in their own judgement will, as you say, reach their own conclusions; others, not as confident or experienced in making judgments, need a guide which could be you, could be me, could be Jesus or another prophet. The path isn't as important as the goal and one of the issues of contemporary churches is they've become focused on the path and the attendant temporal, secular power and money that can come with it instead of their notional primary role.
J I have been associated with something called THIS I BELIEVE since 1950. It was initiated with Edward R. Murrow, broadcast on CBS to 39 million listeners weekly and was, I believe, the best selling nonfiction book in 1952.
Check it out on Wickipedia. Also, www.thisibelieve.org It is non religious. Indeed, the TIBs in recent years have mentioned a god far less than in the 1950s.
My TIB was broadcast on CBS in 1954 and printed in newspapers. When I became a history professor in 1992m I incorporated TIB in my curriculum. A number of students told me that this was their most meaningful college experience.
I have conducted 10 4-6 week TIB programs in NJ and NY. A great majority of the participants, after listening and discussing other TIBs, venture to write their own TIBs. A meaningful experience.
I have also been involved with Eisenhower Fellows since its inception in 1953. Eisenhowerfellowships.org. I was the stimulus for an EisenhowerFellowship/This I Believe book in 2016. None of the 34 published Fellows’ TIBs focused on ‘god.’
That's excellent, thanks for the information and the links Keith. You should underline "This I" so that the link is complete.
As a psychotherapist, I understood that this is a major skill to have, to be helpful to others. We can't "fix" others with our advice, but we certainly can join people in their journeys, making sure to not be another obstacle for them, but instead a support.