Fear/hatred of the "other". So many men (all white, in my experience) are so terrified of gay men because (I suspect) they are afraid that someone will treat them the same way they treat women. I suspect that the hatred that the "other" will get to be on the same level as with the same privileges as white men is based in much the same fe…
Fear/hatred of the "other". So many men (all white, in my experience) are so terrified of gay men because (I suspect) they are afraid that someone will treat them the same way they treat women. I suspect that the hatred that the "other" will get to be on the same level as with the same privileges as white men is based in much the same feeling. It is either that or the misguided notion that they are the "top tier" of humanity and all others are beneath them and they cannot stand to see "others" getting the same rights as their "god given" rights.
I think you nailed it here, Ally. My only added comment is that the dynamic you describe is probably universal and more associated with white people in our experience because there are more of us here and we have had the most impact on shaping our society and its institutions. Looking around the globe these days, the "other" syndrome is alive and well in all of the current conflicts. That is why it strikes me Our Great American Experiment is such a challenging endeavor: by main strength and awkwardness, we strive to rise above the fears you describe. It ain't easy, as Heather's relentless history lessons demonstrate. While we are guilty of frequent, often tragic, missteps in our striving, it may be useful to pause and ask;"compared to what? Compared to whom?" The answer does not justify our failures, but it does put in perspective the immense challenge the Founding Fathers placed in our hands. Too many Americans have turned their backs on our heritage (both the rights and responsibilities embedded in what we have been given. And a great many accept the challenge and strive to make good on the promise of America. My sense is that acceptance is what draws most of us to this dialogue stimulated by Heather's fascinating history class.
We do have a lot of work to do; we know that. Doing it is a noble endeavor and, despite endless frustrations and frequent setbacks, offers priceless satisfaction. Our tool, as Ned notes, is sustained engagement. It helps to know you are not alone.
Human beings are still SO tribal. It seems like it takes a certain level of self-awareness to be able to question that tribal instinct's knee-jerk reactions, and it also seems like there are a lot of people that haven't got the first clue as to HOW to be self-reflective. Or why they should be.
Perhaps it is because as children we need someone wise to to world to tell us what to do (like don't run into the street) some are more comfortable being bossed around by dictators than seeing anyone of lesser "status" be given some help toward equality, and often those who live like kings have the most trouble seeing anybody else (who is not working their will) get a leg up. Also I think all of us invest in different ways in the way things are and some are a lot more comfortable than others responding to change. Appeals to return to a largely fictional "good old days" , be it Roy Moore's misty utopian view of the US South prior to the Civil War, or a "Forever Reich" dictatorial "strong men"
promise a return of "Glory Days" that were really no more the gory days.
Fear/hatred of the "other". So many men (all white, in my experience) are so terrified of gay men because (I suspect) they are afraid that someone will treat them the same way they treat women. I suspect that the hatred that the "other" will get to be on the same level as with the same privileges as white men is based in much the same feeling. It is either that or the misguided notion that they are the "top tier" of humanity and all others are beneath them and they cannot stand to see "others" getting the same rights as their "god given" rights.
I think you nailed it here, Ally. My only added comment is that the dynamic you describe is probably universal and more associated with white people in our experience because there are more of us here and we have had the most impact on shaping our society and its institutions. Looking around the globe these days, the "other" syndrome is alive and well in all of the current conflicts. That is why it strikes me Our Great American Experiment is such a challenging endeavor: by main strength and awkwardness, we strive to rise above the fears you describe. It ain't easy, as Heather's relentless history lessons demonstrate. While we are guilty of frequent, often tragic, missteps in our striving, it may be useful to pause and ask;"compared to what? Compared to whom?" The answer does not justify our failures, but it does put in perspective the immense challenge the Founding Fathers placed in our hands. Too many Americans have turned their backs on our heritage (both the rights and responsibilities embedded in what we have been given. And a great many accept the challenge and strive to make good on the promise of America. My sense is that acceptance is what draws most of us to this dialogue stimulated by Heather's fascinating history class.
We do have a lot of work to do; we know that. Doing it is a noble endeavor and, despite endless frustrations and frequent setbacks, offers priceless satisfaction. Our tool, as Ned notes, is sustained engagement. It helps to know you are not alone.
Human beings are still SO tribal. It seems like it takes a certain level of self-awareness to be able to question that tribal instinct's knee-jerk reactions, and it also seems like there are a lot of people that haven't got the first clue as to HOW to be self-reflective. Or why they should be.
Perhaps it is because as children we need someone wise to to world to tell us what to do (like don't run into the street) some are more comfortable being bossed around by dictators than seeing anyone of lesser "status" be given some help toward equality, and often those who live like kings have the most trouble seeing anybody else (who is not working their will) get a leg up. Also I think all of us invest in different ways in the way things are and some are a lot more comfortable than others responding to change. Appeals to return to a largely fictional "good old days" , be it Roy Moore's misty utopian view of the US South prior to the Civil War, or a "Forever Reich" dictatorial "strong men"
promise a return of "Glory Days" that were really no more the gory days.