You are right, I’m a tired old grandma, but no, I would NEVER defend abusers bad behavior. Nor republican’s treasonous behavior. I will never get that old and tired.
You are right, I’m a tired old grandma, but no, I would NEVER defend abusers bad behavior. Nor republican’s treasonous behavior. I will never get that old and tired.
Jeri, my point is that it’s very hard to admit that you were tricked into giving your heart and soul to an abuser. Spouses keep telling themselves that the abuser will get better, that they only act that way part of the time. Look how the MAGA people are gaslighted into isolation as far as news is concerned , much like an abuser isolates the victim from friends and family. Trump uses mob tactics: first request is for a small thing, then for a bigger illegal thing…until the person is in deep. No one in Trump’s orbit manages to keep their reputation intact —and, when they finally find their red line, he attacks them.
I had a best friend who was excellent example of that. Smart, more intelligent, but bullied (gently) for the 20+ years that I watched from the sidelines. Now it’s a national epidemic. No argument here. It was her vision of “ideal family” that kept her sucked in. In the end, they look great, but there are holes I could drive a semi through that are not posted on FB. Phony perfection is quite a draw I guess.
Mary, Having been in that type of situation for several years, I ask myself why I haven't seen the similarities. You are absolutely correct. Those who stick with him are either too stupid to see what's really going on and/or too embarrassed to admit they've been scammed. And by staying linked to the scammer, they think they are saving face but really, the only people that agree with them are also being scammed. It's a very sick cycle of behavior to be involved in and it takes much strength and introspection to escape from their grasp.
Jeanne, that’s why the advice in the book “Beyond Contempt” is so useful. The author shows ways to allow people to see for themselves through skillful interaction. It’s a game changer. I hadn’t realized how the wording of my questions indicated superiority and closed down the conversations.
"Just find me a few votes. My people and I will take it from there." Haven't we heard that from SOM himself? What can they do to you if all you do is "find" a few votes? The picture of a mobster (M above) couldn't be clearer.
You are right, I’m a tired old grandma, but no, I would NEVER defend abusers bad behavior. Nor republican’s treasonous behavior. I will never get that old and tired.
Jeri, my point is that it’s very hard to admit that you were tricked into giving your heart and soul to an abuser. Spouses keep telling themselves that the abuser will get better, that they only act that way part of the time. Look how the MAGA people are gaslighted into isolation as far as news is concerned , much like an abuser isolates the victim from friends and family. Trump uses mob tactics: first request is for a small thing, then for a bigger illegal thing…until the person is in deep. No one in Trump’s orbit manages to keep their reputation intact —and, when they finally find their red line, he attacks them.
I had a best friend who was excellent example of that. Smart, more intelligent, but bullied (gently) for the 20+ years that I watched from the sidelines. Now it’s a national epidemic. No argument here. It was her vision of “ideal family” that kept her sucked in. In the end, they look great, but there are holes I could drive a semi through that are not posted on FB. Phony perfection is quite a draw I guess.
Mary, Having been in that type of situation for several years, I ask myself why I haven't seen the similarities. You are absolutely correct. Those who stick with him are either too stupid to see what's really going on and/or too embarrassed to admit they've been scammed. And by staying linked to the scammer, they think they are saving face but really, the only people that agree with them are also being scammed. It's a very sick cycle of behavior to be involved in and it takes much strength and introspection to escape from their grasp.
Jeanne, that’s why the advice in the book “Beyond Contempt” is so useful. The author shows ways to allow people to see for themselves through skillful interaction. It’s a game changer. I hadn’t realized how the wording of my questions indicated superiority and closed down the conversations.
Just placed the book on hold through our public library system. I look forward to reading it.
Janea, I hope that it helps you as much as it’s helping me.
"Just find me a few votes. My people and I will take it from there." Haven't we heard that from SOM himself? What can they do to you if all you do is "find" a few votes? The picture of a mobster (M above) couldn't be clearer.